Today, I am sitting on the hardwood floor, in our lounge room. My body feels pretty normal. My neck aches a little, my tummy is full of dinner, my mouth tastes nicely, of the drink I just gulped. I am weary from a day of work, and the transition of coming home to my beautiful, energetic, noisy children. Benjamin is cycling home in the darkness. I am always happier when everyone is safely home. My biggest fear is one of my loved ones dying.
Oh, and I have lymphoma, stage four. What does this even mean? I'm just me. Mortal, but that is in the one-day-far-away category, isn't it? The doctor, bizarrely, told me there are a lot of little lymphomae, tripping around my lymph system, like jiggling jelly-fish in a warm sea. Some of them have twisted all together, left of my belly-button, and I can feel them. An 8cm x 5cm mobile mass, says the computerised tomography report. I can feel lumps in my neck and groin, and can imagine these funny little lymphomae, dancing around w…
SAM!!!!! 'Twas a pleasure to meet such an adorable wee lad today!!
I am really enjoying spending time with close friends here in Seattle. Today Katie and I had a lovely relaxing catch-up, and early in the morning, Nikki and I walked around Green Lake, talked and prayed. It was a healing, nurturing time for which I am thankful. Laurel and Melissa bounced around this evening for a bridesmaid dress fitting. Laurel is so excited about marrying Christofer in 10 days!
I find Seattle's gray weather (yep, it's freezing cold here. Anywhere else in the world, this would be called WINTER!) very difficult. Every time I return from being away, my soul aches with a deep sense of not belonging, of missing 'my people', with whom I have a long history. Yet today, and the wonderful friends I spent it with, was so comforting. Even though this place isn't my 'home' in a heart sense, the people here whose stories and lives I share are superb.